GCSE results

As you may know if you live in the UK tomorrow (22nd August) all of the thousands of teenagers who sat their GCSEs will be picking up their results: myself included. To say that I am nervous would be an exaggeration of the highest level. I was fine (well I say fine if you can say that not being able to sleep and having very vivid dreams about failure is fine) until I watched the news and they said that "GCSE results this year are significantly lower than previously due to examiners marking papers more harshly". Well thats just great, thanks for telling me that when I am already a bundle of nerves, is it really necessary?

Its no wonder that so many people my age are having breakdowns over things like results, not only do we have the massive pressure that several single letters can completely change our lives and will impact us forever in whatever we want to do, but then you have high nosed people making things ten times worse than it needs to be. At least give us some hope that we have passed rather than squish it before we even know the results ourselves.

Then not only do we have people in high places complaining, but we have those who are older than us telling us that GCSEs are not important and that A-Levels are harder etc. Well yes I am perfectly aware that A-Levels are harder, thats obvious, a monkey could work that out, but at the time you found GCSEs hard as well. I also would count all my chickens that you were just as nervous as I or anyone my age when you were picking up your results, so why don't you stop complaining and shut up.

So thats my small rant and I have everything crossed that I have got the grades that I want and that what they are saying is not as true as they say.

Teachers and students

Obviously high school is a horrible time for all of us and if you have had or are having a good experience then you my friend are one of the lucky ones. Now, let me paint you a pretty picture of my personality when I am in school; I am extremely shy and quiet when in classrooms with people who are not my friends. I only have a small group of friends and would really rather not venture outside of that confinement, so therefore you can call me an introvert. I am conscientious about homework and school work and in my entire school life I have only missed about three pieces of homework, I get good grades but hardly ever put my hand up in class because of social anxiety: I am what you call a typical nerd. Right, now that's out of the way, I am going to tell you a few experiences I have had in high school.

In year seven (so about 11-12), despite what I said in the first paragraph, in year seven I was confident and had a lot of friends (yep, miss popular over here) and I didn't really care about answering back to teachers. However, this time in science a girl who had some sort of learning difficulty was playing with the splint I used to light the Bunsen burner, as myself and my group were doing the experiment that we were told to do, she was lighting and re-lighting the splint. We ignored it for a while until she dropped it on my foot; so obviously we all told her to stop playing with fire or someone would get hurt. She then cried and went off to her helper, who was literally like Satan in a woman's body, lets call her Mrs B. Mrs B then started shouting at me for telling this girl off then my actual teacher came over and starting tell me off as well. So obviously I was pretty pissed off at the fact that I had done nothing wrong and I was getting screamed at, so I answered back, I think I said something along the lines of "If anyone else was playing with fire and it landed on someone's foot, you'd be having a go at them, but just because its **** you think its okay to have a go at me" he then literally screamed at me to shut up. What was great though was that my entire class started having a go at my science teacher and saying that he was being harsh towards me (real sense of community when teenagers join together to prove teachers wrong). I ended up getting detention because I had proved him wrong and he couldn't take it. I hasten to add that this was my first and my last ever detention I had throughout my school life, so that just shows you how much of an idiot that teacher was being.

Also in year seven, a boy in my form was a complete and utter prat to me. I wouldn't say he bullied me but he wasn't the nicest to me and often remarked on my weight (I hadn't lost my puppy fat then and I was still much shorter than everyone else and so I looked a bit like a gnome), my eyes and how big my nose was and that I got spots, unfortunately I was one of those teenagers that got bad spots early on in puberty (they're not so bad now, thank god) but hardly anyone one else in my classes was going through this stage and so he always made fun of me for it. Although on a side note: karma is a bitch and he ended up getting extremely severe acne a year or so later which was much worse than what I ever had. However, back on point, he carried on with this annoying nitpicking at me for the first term of year seven, the only reason that he stopped was when he saw me talking to my big brother, who at the time was in year 11 and was 6ft2 which was very intimidating to us little year sevens. After he saw me with my brother he never said another bad word to me ever again; it just shows you how ridiculous boys can be at this age, just ignore them and if that doesn't work get your big brother to stand next to you.

Now, after year seven our form got split up and you start getting set, I was in really good sets but that meant that I was with none of my friends, so I had to make new ones and this unfortunately was when I started to become shy and introverted and gradually as I have gotten older its getting worse, which is the most annoying thing in the world. However, this has created some pretty interesting school experiences, but for the benefit of this post not getting to long, they will be shared another day.

Irritation for the human race

The human race can be the most obnoxious, irritating and just damn right rude things you will ever encouter in your life. Yes, we have good things, but this post is going to focus on the bad: call me a pessimist, I don't care.
Down below I have complied a list of things that people do that really make me want to lose all of my morals and punch the person in the face. I am not saying I am not guilty of doing all of these things because lets face it I have probably done all of these things, but they still annoy the crap out of me.

*disclaimer; may be some foul language but it is kept to a minimum and also this is not my best writing, instead it was written as a rant, I apologise, half decent blog posts will resume as normal shortly*

• people who think they are better than everyone else

Why? Who gave you divine right to think you are better than anyone else? Who do you think you are? Just because you may have a better upbringing/more money/better morals etc, so what? You are just a bad a person as they are but just for a whole different reason. 

• stubbornness

I respect morals and holding your ground, but there comes a point where its just like, COME ON, loosen up stop being selfish and ignorant. Because that's what stubbornness effectively is it's just being selfish, when it gets to the point where you actually stop others for having fun because you wont do things any other way except your own.

• when you can actually smell the bulls**t when someone is sprouting a story to you 

(excuse the potty mouth, but I believe it was necessary)

I don't understand why you would want to tell a story that is completely made up just to make you look good. NO, just don't do it, don't lie, you WILL get caught out and end up looking like a complete idiot. Just don't do it, if you feel yourself wanting to tell a story of lies, go into another room and put a bin on your head.

• people who kiss ass 

Look, I get it, you like this person but the sun does not shine out of their ass. You just sound like an idiot when all you do is compliment them, especially when what you're saying is complete rubbish. Stooooop it please, for your sake if not my own because I will sit on you.

• people who make fun of others just because they are different and make them uncomfortable

Welcome to high school this should be renamed as. Seriously, what gave certain teenagers the right to make others feel unnecessarily uncomfortable just because they don't want to go out and smoke weed and get drunk but would rather do other things? The amount of times someone in my school would take the mick out of me for liking Harry Potter or anything else remotely nerdy was ridiculous: so what if I don't like the same things as you, chances are I probably think you're a dick, so just stop talking to me if you're going to be a douche about me.

• people who just constantly have to be right about everything

Let me just tell you one thing; you are never right all the time, so my dear, just accept that the probability of you being wrong is possible, just accept it and move away. Especially if there is evidence to prove you are wrong, don't for the love of God keep arguing because you look like a ninny. 

• those that have so much anger towards a person but never confront the person

What is the point of just being angry with someone and never telling them? If you tell them they might realise that they are being annoying and stop or if they don't agree with you then they will just leave your life, after all if you have so much anger towards them you wont care if they leave. Don't be bitchy behind their back because you will be caught out and you will look like the bad guy. So step up and stop getting walked all over please, have some self-respect.

• indirect statues/tweets 

Oh God, if there's one thing that makes me want to crumple up the internet over it is indirect statues or tweets. To start off, if you are never going to say it to their face then please DON'T just say it over the internet. Be a grown up about it all and tell the person instead of just hiding behind a computer screen. If you feel like doing an indirect, write it out, then delete it and step away from the internet until you have calmed down.

• when people suddenly start caring when something happens but didn't give a crap about you before

For example, a boy in my year's father has died from a long battle of cancer; no one cared before he died, now all of a sudden everyone is trying to pretend like they know him. Well no, I'm sorry but if you didn't care before, I'm pretty sure that the boy only wants his friends around him at this sad time. I encourage people to pay their respects but don't over step it and act like their best friend when you have barely uttered a word beforehand. Its like the same thing with suicide; no one cares when they are alive, but as soon as they are dead, suddenly they were the best thing since sliced bread. If you really thought that, how about telling them when they can still respond to you.

• people who say they didn't study/revise when they actually spent months revising. WHAT IS THE POINT IN LYING ABOUT THAT?

There is no shame in revising, everyone does it at some point. You don't seem more smart just because you say you haven't revised and then get full marks, you just look like a liar. You're not Einstein so please do not try to fool me that you are.

• people who never ever say sorry even when they know they are wrong

All it is is one word, if you know you are in the wrong, swallow your pride and say sorry because otherwise you drag the argument out longer than it needs to be and you end up looking like a bellend. In the end people will respect you more for admitting you're wrong that being arrogant and insisting you're right.

That will be all for now, but my God if you had seen the first draft of this it was just a collection of obscenities and keyboard smashes because these are the most annoying and irritating traits that people have. There are obviously many more, but these are the collection that have been annoying me recently. I can only apologise but this was written when I was in rant mode, so I apologise for the lack of good writing, but its good to have a moan everyone once in a while, especially when then human population is as annoying as it it.

Thoughts on Revision, Boston, Margaret Thatcher, Cardiff City.

As I'm writing this I am fully aware that I should be revising. In all honesty, I shouldn't even be near a computer but I used the excuse I was using Bitesize (which I have open in a tab but I haven't actually looked at anything yet. But I have written a letter and am slowly working on a report for English, so I'm not totally slacking). I'm not sure if I have said this before but I recently asked my mum to put a password on my computer because I have such a bad attention span; put me near a computer with internet access and I'm gone with the wind. Even so, I have found that because my computer has been semi-inaccessible, I have had far less distractions and have done so much more productive revision, I have also found myself using other forms of entertainment other than the internet to fuel my boredom. By doing things such as delegating that Sunday is my baking day or by 6:30 PM I can stop revision and I can read or watch Merlin or Doctor Who for an hour before bed, I've found it works wonders. I suppose its the little things in life that help you through the tough and boring things.

Throughout this revision period I am currently in I have realised that I cannot follow a timetable to save my life. I don't know why, but since I made my revision timetable on the 8th March I have not actually followed a single slot of what I proposed to do. This isn't to say that I haven't done any revision, because I most certainly have, but its almost as if I have purposely not followed it as if to rebel against myself... The logic? Well there isn't any.

I am absolutely dumbfounded by the Boston explosions that happened on the 15/04/13. It seriously makes me worry about the human race and question what has gone so wrong for people to think that things like this are okay. They most certainly are not, any sane human being would agree with me. To bomb people who are running to give aid to those less fortunate and to have their legs blown off or to be killed, it really makes me wonder where the justice in the world is.

Now, don't scream at me and immediately stop reading over this extremely controversial lady. I just want to pay my respects, and despite your own opinions, let the woman rest in peace. RIP.

On a more positive note, Cardiff City football club played against Charlton Athletic last night (16/04/03) and drew 0-0. However, importantly they secured that all important point to get them automatic promotion. Now, I am not a football fan (at least not any more, I was back in the day) but my dad and brother are extremely passionate about the club and it gave me such pleasure to see how excited they were, they arrived home in fits of tears and even now a whole 24 hours later, my dad cant talk about it without tearing up. My family have been fans of the club for several generations and to see them climb up into the ranks is remarkable. My granddad would have been so happy, and it physically pains me to know that he will never see his team play live in premiership, sometimes life is extremely unfair.

A quick note to say....

Just a really quick post to tell anyone that is reading this that I will be somewhat slacking with posts for the next few months up until June because of my upcoming GCSE exams, obviously they are my first priority and so to help me resist temptation I have asked my mum to put a password on my computer. I have told her though that after six o'clock I can go on there because after all all work and no play makes Emma a sad girl. And my doctor who's are on my computer and I don't think I can go two months without watching them! So bare with me and regular posting will resume momentarily.

I can only apologise

I can only say sorry for not writing a blog post in almost a week, except I have been extremely busy this week. However here is a catch up of what I have done.

I got my first Easter egg off my brother on Tuesday

I had exam results on Thursday (the less said about that the better, lets just say WJEC probably are not the most popular organisation with teenagers and teachers at this precise moment in time)

My nan brought me loads of cake mixture and ingredients to bake some treats today (I will probably post a blog post once they have been made)

I built a DVD rack- I've built so many things this year 

I started watching Doctor Who series 5 this week- very much enjoying it although I'm not too far in. AND I also started watching Merlin Series 1 again, and it makes me sad knowing what is going to happen but none the less I'm definitely enjoying it more this time around.

And that's about all that has happened this week. Hopefully I will schedule posts so they are not as disjointed... how about once a week on a Saturday or maybe twice a week? You see the problem is, is that I'm not that interesting so I don't have much to say, haha. 

What's on my mind?

Are you sitting comfortably? Yes? Well lets get ready to take a trip through to my brain, good luck.

Have you ever loved a celebrity so much that you begin to hate them because of the emotional pain or feels that they leave you in? If you answered no, then I am very jealous of your sanity and capability to like something or someone without it effecting your life. If you answered yes, the I feel your pain, trust me I really do. The two people in particular (well more like gods than just people) that just make me loose all concentration and are the people to accuse for my high expectations in men are Colin Morgan and Daniel Radcliffe, those beautiful, beautiful men.

Then we have the fictional side of my brain which includes my believing (and I wholeheartedly believe this) that I am a wizard, I only can't do magic because of the whole not being able to do magic in front of Muggles and its hard because I live with Muggles 24/7, and also I'm not 17 yet so I still have the trace on me. I also spend  a lot more time than I should thinking about ways I could survive in the hunger games should I have the need to and who I would be come allies with, what I would ask my sponsors for and what if I didn't even have any sponsors, what district would I live in? It's just too many derisions to be taken lightly. I also think about what faction I would be in or would I be divergent, would I be able to be like Tris and lose everything I cared about and have to carry on fighting anyway? Where would the doctor take me in the Tardis? Would I be a good companion? What about in the time of Arthurian legends, would I be a sorcer like merlin or a noble/royal like Arthur and Morgana or would I be a servant like Gwen?

The I have what I like to call the sensible part of my brain that thinks about matters such as school, university's, my future, exams it tells me I should be revising or doing homework (only to be ignored by another part of the brain) I should be eating healthier and doing more exercise  I should be more social and try to come out of my shell a bit. Oh you look fine today stop fussing about what people think, that kind of thing.

However, in contrast of the previous part of the brain I have my devil side that thinks oh you have plenty of time to do that homework piece leave it until last minute, ah it's ageeeees until exams don't start revising you'll have enough time to do that in study leave. Have some cake you can exercise tomorrow, it's fine you're not overweight so you don't need to worry. What the heck is going on with your face today you look like a tramp. You get the idea that part of your brain that every girl has and tends to listen to more than the sensible part.

Then I have a part of my brain that is extremely anti social and tends to be activated primarily when I'm in school, the part of me that just wants to destroy everyone just for breathing too near me or for speaking or just being there, it's for the type of people in school who are destined to fail and you just have no time for.

I then have the part which completely overrides everything especially in school which makes me think I am listening and taking in what teachers are saying when in actual fact I am making up fantasy scenarios, or thinking about what I'm going to do when I go home and end up literally having no clue what I'm doing when it comes to doing work and ends up making me seem like I am deficient. Along with this I also have the part that remembers seriously annoying song lyrics (call me maybe is a prime example of this) and makes it stick in my head all day leading me to driving everyone crazy with my constant humming.

*phew* I could go on forever, but I will stop now before you think I'm so crazy you'll never return again.

Universities and the Future

Who ever came up with the idea that we have to chose our entire futures before we are even sixteen was stupid, very, very, very stupid.

I am currently in year 11 and fifteen years old, I most certainly do not feel old enough to be doing GCSEs let alone thinking about what I want to choose for A-Levels and also in short deciding what kind of university course I want to do and how many UCAS points I need to be able to further my studies. It's completely crazy! I'm pretty sure that the majority of teenagers my age go through this exact or similar feeling of feeling like a very small fish in an extremely big pond. 

I had a careers interview today and a sixth form parents evening thing last night, seeing all of the information that they threw at us and the options form for the subjects we want to continue with next year was extremely overwhelming and made me panic slightly. It suddenly became very real that in fact I am considered old enough to make these decisions and whether I'm ready or not I will have to decide soon enough what I want to do with my life, and pray that everything will work out and be okay. 

But right now I am just going to focus on passing my GCSEs and decide what I want to do on results day.... fun times lie ahead for me.....

January Favourites!

Merlin

My ultimate favourite this month- I just started watching it this month and in the past two weeks I have progressed on to series 3, only I haven't been able to get much further because of school, but you can be sure that as soon as I have a moment to spare I will be watching it again, because it is great! If you haven't watched it because you think its not really up your street, watch it anyway because I thought that and now look what has happened!

Colin Morgan and Bradley James

So in short of loving Merlin, I have also discovered two new celebrities with whom I have become obsessed with, more so their friendship, its brilliant and you can genuinely see that they are brilliant friends and it makes me sad to think they probably will never film together again. Also its not so bad that they are both very good looking! 

Watch this video here to get an idea of what I'm talking about! (there's about 13 videos in all, but all extremely funny)

Doctor Who

Interestingly enough I never thought that Doctor Who would ever be in my favourites but alas it is. I've been really enjoying watching all of the old episodes and even watching some of the newer ones with Matt Smith who I am very slowly but surely becoming to love like the majority of the fan base on Tumblr, however, I will always be a David Tennant fan and I doubt that will change very quickly, but who knows my Doctor Who favourite pairing might change from Tennant and Rose to Smith and Clara the new companion... but lets not get too ahead of ourselves! 

  

Buying new books

 January is traditionally the month where the adults are saving and the children are spending, well in my defence I haven't spent that much only on books, I love the thrill of getting new books and even love the process of choosing them, reading reviews and waiting for it to arrive (I know, I know, I am one wild teenager.) If you would like to see what books I did purchase then click here I also brought Harry Potter Film Wizardary as well but that is not in the list as I got it a bit later on.

Getting an A in physics 

I had my interm report on Wednesday where my school give you a list with all of your subjects and your current grades and attainment levels and I am usually disappointed (Mainly because I am really hard on myself, I'm not one to give myself a pat on the back very often) however, saying that I was really pleased this time around because I somehow managed to get an A in Physics which traditionally many call the hardest subject so I was pretty impressed with myself, and also pleased with the fact that all of the grades I am currently at are all beating my predicted grades! Bring on GCSEs in the summer I say!

Dreaming

A very strange favourite as everybody dreams every single day, in fact did you know you only actually remember 40% of your dreams despite the fact that when you're asleep you are constantly in dreamland? Well anyway this month I have been taking more of a notice of my dreams and they have kept me wholly entertained in the boredom of my maths lessons!

January exams are OVER!

Thankfully, I have finished January exams today, with ICT being my last one, so now I am rewarding myself with a week off and then starting to revise for Summer exams, my theory being that if I start early enough then I wont be stressing as much nearer to the time. But for now I will focus on the McFly Unsaid Things... Our Story that I borrowed from Molly and blog.

The curse of being a teenager

This Christmas holidays should have seen me spending the majority of my free time revising for my upcoming examinations (English Language and ICT) however, being a normal teenager like myself, I completely ignored that and left everything until the very last day before I go back. This wouldn't be so bad if I didn't have a maths booklet (which I don't even have, but he will still some how expect me to do) due in tomorrow that would usually take me about a week to complete, an English Language exam on Thursday which I have't revised for since I broke up from school two weeks ago and have since completely forgotten what techniques I have to use to answer the questions, and my ICT exam is next Tuesday which I literally haven't even picked up a book for, I also have other homework (probably but I cannot will myself to go and have a look, because if I see it I will have to do it, so I'm playing innocent). But yet despite knowing I have all of this to do I still refuse to except responsibilities and am instead reading blogs and looking through Tumblr and writing this completely pointless blog post, WHY do teenagers do this? I am one myself and I could not tell you the answer for anything (probably because I would be too lazy to tell you, even if I knew.)
Anyway I am off to pretend I am really doing my school work whilst doing everything I shouldn't be doing. Have a lovely day (And if you have no homework/work/revision I envy you with all of my heart)